Sunday, April 01, 2007

Bringing The Rock With MLB Previews: AL East.

1) The Pixies (Boston Red Sox) - Models of consistency when it comes to team quality -- they may not crack the top of the heap, but they'll always be putting out teams of never less than very good quality; beating out the Mets for Dice-K only made that much easier this year, and permitted Jonathan Papelbon to close again. Two fears revolve around who'll get the ball from the starters to Papelbon and whether J.D. Drew is going to actually play a full season, but they'll take the division crown if they don't fall apart in Fenway drama.

2) Jay-Z (New York Yankees) - so what if Hova is a Brooklyn guy? He's the perfect representation of the Yankees -- they haven't won a championship in years; haven't put it together for the ring, but that offense is as consistent as S. Carter's lyrical bomb-dropping with Jeter, Giambi, Abreu, and A-Rod. When they lose, it's because of a lack of solid arm production (bad beats), but no one denies they still have the firepower to win -- problem is, this'll be one of those years where they finish second (although all is not lost, Yankee Nation, WC hopes are still there.)

3) Danko Jones (Toronto Blue Jays) - Underrated at all times, but sometimes rightfully so. Great elements with an ace like Roy Halladay, B.J. Ryan as closer, and the addition to Frank Thomas to Vernon Wells and Troy Glaus makes for a good 3-4-5. Much like their musical representation, they play in a very crowded field at the top in their division, and can't crack the dominance of the Yanks-Sawx axis.

4) Spank Rock (Baltimore Orioles) - Baltimore club is probably hard to explain to people outside the region, much like the actions of Orioles owner Peter Angelos (that's as far as I can take that comparison musically.) Although improved with a decent front end for a rotation in Erik Bedard and Daniel Cabrera, they still can't go toe to toe with the top two teams in the division. Bringing in Aubrey Huff helps, but Steve Trachsel as your fourth starter doesn't.

5) Morbid Angel (Tampa Bay Devil Rays) - no matter how much talent is on this team, they're in the wrong division to make any sort of impact (because all talent will be young and cheap); they will always be playing spoiler, the talented group that can't break out into mainstream consciousness because of genre. The Rays have a good outfield with Carl Crawford, Rocco Baldelli, and Delmon Young (hopefully he doesn't throw any bats); Scott Kazmir will pitch well, but I don't see what else they have right now. New third baseman Akinori Iwamura will be interesting to watch.

Previously: NL East, NL Central, NL West.

2 comments:

twins15 said...

Great stuff!

And good call with The Pixies... a great band.

Signal to Noise said...

Thanks! It was tough to come up with bands for some cities -- I almost kind of cheated on Tampa Bay (I was going to go for Gainesville's Against Me!) before I remembered they had good death metal bands come form that area.